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I woke up today and as usual looked at the newspaper. Came across something on the first page that struck a chord in me. It was the verdict on the Khairlanji massacre, where six people have been given the death sentence. This comes two years after the actual killing of Priyanka Bhotmange, her mother and her brother. For a justice system that is known to prolong and delay indefinitely, it came as a surprise to me that they had actually delivered justice so soon. Of course, not all the people who were involved were accused and not all the accused were convicted. And it in no way reduces the horror of the manner in which Priyanka died.
I had blogged about this on my Yahoo 360 blog at that time, feeling very strongly about it. I still do. In case you don’t know what happened to Priyanka, on 29th September, 2006, Priyanka and her mother had testified against a few people of the village who had earlier injured(I think) a policeman. They were arrested that very day and by evening, were even released from jail.(such is the justice system). That evening, the arrested and their friends made their way to Priyanka’s hut, dragged her mother and her brother outside.
Her brother tried calling for help on his mobile which was snatched and thrown away. Then Priyanka and her mother were stripped, paraded across the village, raped, and as if that was not enough, metal rods and sticks were pushed into her privates, they were hurtled across walls, strapped to bullock carts, gang raped again and again until they died, and even then some continued to rape them. They were then thrown into a ditch. There were actual photographs of Priyanka’s naked body with the rods sticking out, published on many websites and I saw them. I still remember the picture although I cannot bring myself to even recall it mentally.
Priyanka had been only 18 that time, nurturing dreams of joining the army, I think. If you google up her name, there is a website which details the entire horror that they went through.
Her father is the only living survivor of that massacre where a whole village stood by and watched a few people mete their own justice to three helpless human beings, just because they were Dalits. The sense of outrage I feel towards them is still strong and although the death penalty is a good thing, those who got it will never feel the fear, the pain, the humiliation, the terror that Priyanka and her family went through.
It’s 11 pm. The kids are asleep. I’ve finished all the chores in the kitchen. Waiting for Mansoor to return home. And I’m craving for a nice big chocolate bar. I dunno why!!
Saboor wasn’t fasting today and he must have visited the shop down the road about ten times today, buying this and that and although how much I tell him about controlling this snacking habit he’s got into…he doesn’t listen(how can he when I am the inveterate chocoholic myself?)! Azhaan has already picked up Saboor’s habits and the moment he sees Saboor heading out, he asks for ‘cheep’ too. Chips, he means. And every time I go to the shop with Azhaan on my hip, he just assumes I’ve brought back a ‘chaeni’ for him, which is what he says for chocolate.
Those ads on all the cartoon and kiddie channels are the biggest culprits, I know that! And I am also to blame for letting this get way out of hand. I need to be more firm with him, but you know what? Saboor is like a stream of water, a very persistent stream that can erode the hardiest of rocks. And I am just a mom.
Ok, this post is meandering like anything..but before I end I just remembered something. When Saboor was born, he was kept in the NICU(Neonatal ICU) for 15 days and it was a most traumatic time for me. When we were thinking of what to name him, bade baba, my father’s oldest brother who has named quite a few kids in our house suggested Saboor. He said this name meant ‘one who has patience’. At that time I thought it was very relevant because he was in the NICU, waiting so patiently to be taken home. I know, I know…sounds rather maudlin, but in my defense, I was just 20 and not having a baby after I had given birth must have made me a little soft in the head.
Anyway, we named him Saboor and although I do not subscribe to the belief that you become your name, or your name becomes you or stuff like that which is why people in our families are intent on giving a ‘good’ name to their children, I found out another meaning of Saboor some years later.
I was reading a book by an Arabic author who explained the concept of ’sabr’ very succinctly. He said that although people thought of Sabr as patience, it also means ‘persistence’. I re-read the sentence again and again and for a moment, I thought, this is why Saboor is SO persistent! Ok…stop laughing now, but have you ever been in the presence of a nine year old who goes on and on and on about what should I do, can I please play on the computer? for half an hour? for one hour? please? can I buy something to eat? can i eat chocolate? can I watch TV? Phew!
Ok folks…I’m getting back to taking a look at Kite Strings now. Still craving that chocolate although!
I haven’t? I have? Ok, whatever it is, I’m telling it here once again.
Azhaan can recognise two actors. Not surprisingly, one is Imran Khan whom he calls Pappu because of the song. The other one is even less surprising because his is the face that we see so much on TV. None other than Shahrukh Khan.
However, he calls Imran Pappu. And he calls SRK ‘Pachicha’ For a while we couldn’t understand why he would point to the TV and say ‘pachicha’ every time he came on screen. Only after a few days we figured out the reason. ‘Pachicha’ is his version of saying ‘Panchvi Pass’, Shahrukh’s not so popular show on TV that is off air now.
I guess we had been watching enough TV with him around to pick up the relation between Shahrukh’s face and the Panchvi Pass song that blared on the side. This was months ago guys, when Panchvi Pass had just begun and he was probably just 1.5 years. 
I remember, Saboor was a little older than Az now when we went to see Lagaan with him, and although he didnt recognise anyone in that movie, we stepped out, and there was this huge billboard, and he started pointing at it, shouting, ‘Amita…Amita’….it was a billboard of some movie of Amitabh Bachchan’s, I don’t remember which. And yes, at that time, KBC had just begun and we all used to watch it avidly. He must have picked up the name there.
With Saboor, I followed a rule of not letting him watch TV until he was one year old. I don’t know whether that helped, because he watches so much TV now. As for Azhaan, it became very difficult to follow any such regimen because the size of our family had increased and in a joint family you can’t control any such thing. So, Az has been watching TV from quite some time. He dances to all the songs, particularly those from Rock On. 
Right now I find his ‘pachicha’ very cute and I’m writing it down for posterity, although I doubt I will forget it, because I haven’t forgotten how Saboor used to say ‘khountain’ for fountain.
Exams were easier when I had to do them. Seriously.
I hate breaking my head with Saboor. He just doesn’t realise that whether he likes it or not, he has an exam tomorrow. He’s got Social Studies, a combination of Geography and History. Interestingly enough he likes History and I am secretly very pleased about it. I’m already trying to dream up some career for him revolving around history although most likely he will turn to business like his father.
For now, I am waiting for that moment of epiphany to strike him, when he will realise that he needs to work hard and study well. Until then, I just have to keep breaking my head.
I had to write down that word before I forgot it, or before it got lost in the numerous other words that Azhaan comes up with. Saboor has been studying for his exams( oh that almost sounds like my nine year old is a diligent student! I must rephrase)…Ok I have been making Saboor study for his exams, and Azhaan has been the latest terror. He comes around on his bike (its a long, sliding bike kinda thingy..not a tricycle and not a full bike either) and he promptly grabs Saboor’s pencil, saying, ‘Penchi’ and then he grabs the eraser and says ‘Mung-guchi’
I have no idea how the word came about in his head. Just as I don’t know how the word for milk, which we say ‘doodh’ went from ‘boo’ to ‘bijji’ to ‘bijja’, then ‘bijjayee’ and now, ‘bijjajee’. Another funny thing happened the other night. Azhaan started crying in the middle of the night, saying ‘cheedee’ which is what he says for ‘CD’ as in Compact Disc. I got up sleepily wondering what he could be meaning….and then it occurred to me that he was asking for milk, but he had forgotten the word for it! I asked him, Az, do you want bijaajee? And he jumped at the word immediately, almost making me laugh, the way he said, ‘bijaajee..bijaajee’ after that. He he!!
Ok. Her birthday was yesterday on 16th. And I did wish her on midnight and sent across the gift I got for her. But I forgot to write this post yesterday, mainly because I didn’t have internet almost all day(horror of horrors!) and then when the net did come, I was trying to finish work that had come in spades, from office. It completely slipped my mind to write a post for Sidra’s birthday. Ok, now that we’re done with the excuses, let me go ahead.:)
Well, Sidra, my little sister is now twenty! Mashallah. I cannot believe it sometimes because till date I remember the day she was born. I was in 6th and I had come home for lunch when I got to hear that I had a baby sister. For a minute I was disappointed. I had wanted another brother for very selfish reasons. I had some lopsided view that if I had another sister then Abbu would love her more, and it had to do with a joke he had made once about how Jun would be his nose and my sister and I would be his eyes(if I had a sister) and if I had a brother, I would be his nose, and Jun and the younger bro would be his eyes. Ha ha…makes me smile now…I SO wanted to be abbu’s nose!!
Anyway, the disappointment lasted for a minute and then disappeared forever. How could it not? I had never seen such a cute, chubby baby in my life! I fell in love with her instantly. I was ten at that time, and I remember the pride I used to feel in seeing her, when we brought her home. I even took one of the kajal sticks and messily wrote on her talcum powder box, I love Sidra. (she doesnt know about this I’m sure!)
She grew into this absolutely gorgeous baby, and we all doted on her madly. When Abbu passed away, she had not turned two yet. It was such a tragedy that she did not get to know Abbu, so we all tried to make up for it by lavishing her with all our love and attention.
When she was in middle school, I think that is when she and I were at loggerheads with each other. I was her self appointed teacher (by this time I had got married and I had Saboor too) and I used to come over in the weekends to teach her. How we managed to finish her schooling without either of us killing each other, I have no idea.
She’s now in her final year in college and I am so proud of her, mashallah. She’s become indispensable to Ammi in a way I never was, and I am proud of that too.
Ok, before everyone canonises her into Saint Sidra, let me tell you the things about her that make her what she is. (Aah! ) Sorry, Sid, but here I go:
* Is she bossy or what? She redefines the term bossy, especially when she’s talking to papaji (my maternal grandfather who lives with us)
* Lazy – Yes you are. Don’t deny it Sidra!
* The ultimate delegator of duties….Ammi asks her to do something and immediately she will delegate the job to someone else.
Ok ok…I can’t think of anything else. But I hope you had a fabulous birthday Sids, and may you have many, many more. And stay like this always please. All innocence and bossiness packed together! 
These are the things I dread. A note in Saboor’s homework diary asking him to get me to school tomorrow had me worried all day about what the matter could be. Saboor wasn’t sure himself, he said it could be because of some incomplete work.
This year, Saboor has not been doing well in class. Ammi says I was too lenient with him all these years, but what…how can you force a small child to study, study and study? that too when he was in second and third standard, there was hardly anything to study. I also had decided that I would not be those moms who insist on making sure their children come first and rebuke their kids when they don’t live upto their unrealistic expectations.
As a result, Saboor and I had become a bit laidback. Add to it that he didn’t have exams as such..they were called appraisals and didn’t carry the threat of an exam then. This year however, suddenly everything has become a bit too much. The load at school has increased but his attitude hasn’t changed. I am trying my best to make him interested…but then again..he is only nine years old.
I try to think of what I was like at that age, and yes, I perfectly remember that I was no brilliant student myself. But we also didn’t have so much to study back then. In fourth standard, he is learning about deficiency diseases like Kwashirokor and Marasma(I had never heard of the latter until I sat down to teach him), in Science, they are learning the human body ( how do I explain excretory system to a 9 year old who goes into spasms of laughter when I try to tell him what ‘pee’ is actually made of?) It is not detailed, but the concept is there and the teachers expect these kids to learn everything and reproduce it in the exam!!
I do not want to send my child for these so called tuitions because nothing ever happens there except some lady who wants to make a quick buck gets together a number of kids who learn their lessons and repeat everything by rote. Luckily, his class teacher this year is an absolute darling, who is under the misconception that Saboor is the most well behaved, obedient and responsible child in her class. At least she is not like that woman in second standard who kept making Saboor sound like he was mentally challenged just because his handwriting is not good.
So, I realised I didnt get around to what I started writing this post about. I went to school, met his social studies teacher who said that Saboor doesn’t complete his classwork and then when I went to meet his class teacher, she only said that he is working hard and has improved. Well..that’s good, although I sure would like to see some of that improvement in front of my eyes.
Another small crisis has erupted. He cannot find his Hindi homework book and his teacher is marking everyone tomorrow ( they get marks for their books also…egad!) and he insists he gave it to his teacher for correction who says that she doesnt have it at all. He’s telling me he doesn’t want to go to school tomorrow, but then, I told him that even if she gives him zero marks, he is going. Poor kids, every small thing becomes a big crisis for them! And when we think of our childhood with such nostalgia, we probably forget what it was like when we had to face these things!
My sweet sister in law Shazu(Mansoor’s younger sister) had a baby boy yesterday morning. She was SO not prepared for it, because she kept reassuring herself that there was loads of time for the baby to come. I felt like smiling and telling her that very few babies keep their appointment with their due date.
Anyhow, she went into labour on Monday evening, and it kind of became intense yesterday morning and at around 10.45 am, she had a cute little cherub ( who has not been named yet).
This whole process of birth is so amaaazing! I’ve had it happen to me, but this was probably the first time I’ve had it happen to someone very close to me. So it was indeed different to sit outside and wait for news. Azhaan and Rayaan made SUCH a big racket running up and down the corridors, pushing each other, falling over each other, that some other patient complained to the watchman who came and shooed us downstairs.
We sat and twiddled our thumbs downstairs and then one by one, we sneaked back up through another way.
Here are some of the first pics we took….
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Mashallah!
Azhaan let me hold the baby for all of five minutes before he started getting fidgety. He kept pointing to the baby and said, ‘papa’ and he looked thrilled to see a small baby at such close quarters. But after that the novelty wore off and he tried to poke his finger!
We’re going to have a tough time around with the baby and these two. Oh my gosh…these two were just babies themselves!! When did they grow up so soon? And now, they’re going to be toddlers! Mashallah!
When Curtains was released in 2005, it was an extremely low key affair and my stories, although the first in the book, did not have the impact a novel would have had, and nothing really came out of it to project me as a writer. But that did not upset me or deter me, and I went around to all my relatives’s houses, showing them the book, and I even gave a copy of the book to some of my favourite people.
The funny thing is that I didn’t expect anyone to actually read the stories. But I was pleased and flattered when some of them did. The downside was that most people were amused that I chose to write about Vellore. And then there were some who wanted to know who the characters actually were. Meaning, they couldn’t believe that I had imagined these characters but that I had just named them after people who really existed. It was annoying but then I got over it. Those were only four stories and whatever excitement there was over getting published had abated.
What got me thinking off on this post was that whenever my novel, Kite Strings does get published…would I have to explain to all my relatives that, look, that girl Mehnaz is not me. She’s a character I created? Recently someone in my family asked me what my novel was about. When I gave her a very brief synopsis, she said, ‘Oh, so basically you have written about yourself!’. I said ‘No’ emphatically but people will believe what they want to believe.
Gosh…I never realised this when I was writing stories for kids in Open Sesame because even though such situations did arise then(someone or the other would inevitably ask me if the kid in my story is Saboor), it would never be to an extent such as this probably.
I feel like laughing a bit as I say this, but Mehnaz (my protagonist in Kite Strings) falls in love with a guy she meets on the terrace in Vellore and I am so sure I am going to be asked this question by someone or the other, whether it was true! Just in case people, I just want to state, that ‘no, the events that happened in Mehnaz’s life did not happen with me.’
Yes, the day when Kite Strings gets published is still rather far away. I emailed the agency who had shown interest in the beginning of this year, but they had wanted me to cut down the length and add some other stuff. My contact person has quit the agency! When my emails to her bounced, I called them up and learnt that she has left! 
Luckily, I had the email id of the head of this place and I sent an email to her asking her if I could resend my manuscript to her. She replied back asking me to send it in October as they will be getting a new editor then. Which could be a good thing on one hand because for a fresh pair of eyes, the novel might have a certain appeal,…and on the other hand, all the points in favour of the novel that Kavita(my earlier contact there) had collated and put down would be lost on a new person. Anyhow, its probably for the best.
I had started writing a new novel, but I want to get Kite Strings out of my system before I can get back to that. Here’s hoping it sees light of the day whenever at least!! I am not even thinking of this year, or next year. Whenever! That’s my new watchword!
Azhaan loves saying ‘Hi’. Especially to anyone he meets on the road, or even someone on the phone. Its an exuberant ‘hi!!’. A little later, he also says ‘Bye!’ in the same tone.
Funny thing is…whenever Rayaan comes downstairs and inevitably both kids end up fighting, Azhaan sometimes just says ‘Baby, Bye!!’. Gosh…I can’t believe he’s actually telling Rayaan to go! It makes me laugh and feel mortified at the same time!
